If you were a member of the communist Party – doors were opened for you everywhere, even for those who were completely incompetent, they were helped everywhere. After finishing my time in the army, I went to university and majored in history. All our textbooks and required reading were in Russian, so learning Russian in the army had helped me. But I soon realized I didn’t want to study history, because it seemed to me that it was all a fraud, fabricated by those in power. In 1986, I thought that there was no point in living since we were all slaves to injustice, so I wanted to commit suicide.

One day, while I was wrestling with such thoughts, I went to the library and came across the Science and Religion magazine. In those years of ferocious atheism, it was a surprise to find a magazine with any mention of religion. I was curious about what it would say. In this magazine I found an article titled“The Life of Holy Jesus”. Before this I had never read anything about Jesus, I only knew him as the God of the Russians.  I was taught that His way led people to bad things. But in this article, there was a completely different story than what I had been told. This article touched my soul. I read it without any hesitation and wondered how it was possible that people had killed Jesus? Abruptly the article ended but there was a note that the rest of the article would be in the following issue of the magazine.  I eagerly looked for that issue, and I found it! I wanted to take them home. The librarian said that according to the library’s policy, magazines were used for 4 years and then they could be thrown out or given away.

After reading this article my worldview was completely turned upside down. It became clear to me that I should not kill myself. When I told people about Jesus, they would laugh at me. I had found hope and truth in Jesus, but many people turned their backs on me because of it. I believed whole heartedly that Jesus’ way was the only true and right way. Truth was not in the Communist Party and not in religion, but in Jesus only. All that I knew about Jesus was limited to what was in this short article. I had no Bible, and I did not know about the church.

Four years later, I returned to the library to get the magazines.  I was told that the old books and magazines had been transferred to another library. They gave me the address and I hurried to the other library. But there was bad news waiting for me there also.  All the magazines that arrived had been put in a warehouse because they didn’t have time to deal with them. I asked them to let me go to the warehouse and find them myself.  I was warned that it was very dirty in there. I was ready to face anything to get the magazines! So, I went into the warehouse and searched until I found both issues of that magazine.

This is how my life with my Savior began. I learned about Jesus from the pages of a magazine, but how I found the church was truly miraculous! I began going to different libraries hoping to find other books or magazines about Jesus. Once, I found a book called “Wise Word of Elders” (a Christian book). On the inside cover there was an address of a church and an invitation to a Friday meeting.  I thought it was such a long time to wait until Friday and I wondered why wait? I will go there right now!

I found the church that day. It was run by a small group of missionaries, and I am a part of that same church today! Since that time, I believe all that Jesus said about himself,  “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the father except through me” (John 14:6).” ‘

Kazakhstan